Besieged. Also in June...

Someone asked me if everything is okay. I’ve been away more than usual and they wanted to make sure I was well. I’m doing well, thank you!⁣
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Though a bit besieged. I feel like “besieged” is my usurper 2021 word. My word of the year is actually TIRELESSNESS. So it all makes sense, I guess.⁣
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In June, my autoimmune issues flared up until my eyelids cracked. That was unpleasant.⁣
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In June, I also fell lower mentally than I have in a while. The heliotrope rash reminded me that I talk a big game until disease pokes my vanity. And steals my ability to stand in the sunshine. So…⁣
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My husband stayed close while I worked up the nerve to start again. My will was buried under a few tears and I felt like giving up.⁣
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Just for a little while. Then I dusted myself off and began. After prayer, the first thing I did was to renew my organic veggie delivery service. (Link in my profile if you want a coupon!)⁣
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In June, I went back to basics. Broke attachments. Pushed back against preferences in order to find freedom.⁣
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In June, I went from despair to delight as I played sand volleyball (in direct sun) with more flexibility and mobility than I’ve had in years. Just 3 weeks after wondering if my summer was over.⁣
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In June, I continued to prepare for a wedding. And watched my family grow and stretch and struggle and dream.⁣
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In June, I tried on dresses in a department store where no one wore a mask. My husband told me I was beautiful.⁣
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In June, I fell behind in everything. Everything… except for eating vegetables and making time for my husband. I still have messages unanswered and prayers unsaid. I failed and failed and failed again.⁣
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But June was beautiful and July is coming. And tomorrow is another day to live and give thanks to God for who He is and what He has given.⁣
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I expect to go through the cycle of grief and stretching countless times before I die. Each round hopefully bringing me closer to heaven with God’s grace.⁣
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June’s lesson: “Survival mode” is real. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be holy and beautiful. Put some flowers in a vase, hug your people, say your prayers, and don’t forget the vegetables ❤️

Homeless until heaven.

This is my daughter. I’m going to ramble a bit and then tell you more about her adventure…⁣
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Just when you think that you can’t possibly handle any more heart stretching, the good Lord allows more.⁣
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Rending, stretching, breaking, shattering… filling, saturating, expanding, illuminating.⁣
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There’s been a lot going here in the last year or so. So much that I have sometimes been left like a fish gasping on the shore… flopping around wondering how I ended up so out of my element… and when God would let me back in the water.⁣
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Well, I’m a fish learning to breathe air. And a woman learning to inhale under water. And the hope and joy of Jesus Christ overpowers everything in His time.⁣
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Back to the beautiful young woman in the photo…⁣
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My oldest daughter will be leaving home to serve as a missionary to the homeless for a year with @urbanencounterministries.⁣ She’ll be leaving in a month or so, shortly after her brother is married. And I thought I was getting used to departures but I guess I’m not that hardened yet. Maybe I don’t want to be anyway.⁣
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At any rate, I love her, I’m proud of her, I’ll miss her. And if you are interested in sponsoring her work financially, she could use that kind of support as well.⁣
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I think her work might be a little like mine. Both in the wilds of the human condition, trying to figure out how to extend the Gospel of Jesus Christ… without any promise of knowing how that seed will blossom.⁣
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Different but united. We will breathe under water in different cities and marvel at the simplicity of the Word and the aching of the sojourner.⁣
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Homeless until heaven. Following the steps of Jesus, our homeless King who awaits us with His Divine permanence.⁣
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Thank you @shesaidfiat for your radical yes to Christ. That beautiful gift will always console me when I am missing you. ❤️⁣

The kingdom of heaven is like a Petunia

My parish is nestled in the heart of a concrete jungle, a small David against the encroaching mechanization of man. She was built by immigrants. Her classrooms now empty. Her abundant flower gardens tended by just two feminine hands.⁣⁣
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I’ve never met the gardener but I see how she adorns the church. And tucked a potted flower in that one hidden nook.⁣⁣ Beyond the gardens, the flowers seem to go where they will and we search every week for new signs of petunias in hard places.⁣⁣
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These little flowers are joy opportunists. Easily plucked and crushed, yet finding a way.⁣⁣
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I had an image in my mind of the small church property and the shining tabernacle within. And it seemed to me that the delight of Jesus Christ was seeping through the doors, through the ground, and out of every opening of that building.⁣⁣..
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And it was rising up through the cracks in the sidewalk as petunias.⁣⁣
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Back at home, I noticed a plant growing straight up through the asphalt at the end of our street. No sidewalk crack required. It simply grew and poked a perfect hole through that hard surface. My fingers can crush this plant and yet it rises up through what my hands could never penetrate. Mystery.⁣⁣
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How does it rise?⁣⁣
How do we?⁣⁣
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Sometimes I have trouble understanding Church. I see the broken people. I see my own sins. I see institutional failures that challenge me with doubt and anger and grief.⁣⁣ And I think of the flowers, the leaven, the mustard seed (Mt 13)…⁣⁣
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The kingdom of heaven is like smallest seed that transforms into a tree so large that the birds make a home there.⁣⁣
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The kingdom is like leaven which loses itself in the meal until it rises and nourishes.⁣⁣
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Where is the seed? Where is leaven? Where is Church? And when will we see that the Eucharistic feast is not contained… but alive like the mighty petunia in a heart disposed to grace?⁣⁣
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Some day…⁣⁣
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“The Son of man will send his angels, and they will gather out of his kingdom all causes of sin and all evildoers, and throw them into the furnace of fire…Then the righteous will shine like the sun in the kingdom of their Father...”⁣⁣
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And the flowers will be gathered and grow forever.

Because I can...

It’s been a long time since my family has played ball together. Quarantine stole a season and then some. Very grateful to be able to take this selfie.⁣
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I’m stronger than I was last time I tentatively stepped out onto the court. In spite of a recent flare. In spite of residual fatigue.⁣
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“I’m still getting younger!” I said to my kid. And he was (wisely) silent because I’m clearly aging.⁣
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But I ran across the gym and it didn’t hurt. And I thought (not for the first or last time) that I’m glad that I’ve been free to manage my own health care. And to make choices along the way to step into or stay out of the system.⁣
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There’s a massive new building being constructed at a city hospital right now. We pass it every week and I’m amazed that we have enough people and needs to fill it.⁣
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What is health care? Is it different than sick care? Are we better off now than when the buildings were smaller and the resources scarcer?⁣
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The statistics say no. Cancer rates are still high. Overall lifespan is decreasing. Autoimmune disease has reached epidemic proportions. Heart disease, diabetes... it just goes on and on.⁣
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This is not a doom and gloom post. Just a “what the heck are we doing?” post. And a “Thank you, Jesus!” post.⁣ I will certainly die of something sooner or later. But I owe my life to God...⁣
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And every action I take toward honoring His design for my body is a gift given back to Him. I do not worship the body but I care for it reasonably. So that I may serve according to His will.⁣
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After we left the gym I was exhausted and sore. Where are you endorphins?! Taking a hiatus this week and it’s fine. But the gratitude I feel is tremendous and I am eager to go back.⁣
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Because I can. And I know what it’s like to say “I can’t.”⁣
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I don’t want to spend my life counting diagnosis. I want to spend it living. And while visits to shiny medical offices may sometime be necessary, the vast majority of healing happens at home. In the gym. In the woods. In the kitchen. On the couch. On the track. In church. In prayer. With my family.⁣
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I’m so darn tired this week. Flares are a drag. Starting again. Always. And always reorienting back to gratitude. Deo Gratias ❤️

Hold the line, men.

A study of siblings. When Miss Sassy and Z strike a pose, they are not the same. Hilarious.⁣
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I have been reading about the early Church and apostles and this pic made me think of the 12 and all their messy zeal. They surely smelled more like fish and woodsmoke than incense.⁣
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I've also noticed a recent increase in prayer requests from those whose husbands are struggling with their faith.⁣
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Times are difficult. On top of scandals, we now have the 2020 abandonment by spiritual fathers. New divisions and wounds, questions and pressure. Good men are struggling.⁣
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As I contemplate the apostles as real men (truly my brothers and fathers in faith), I sometimes imagine them walking into the room just as my husband would. Sandals scuffing. Water running over rough hands.⁣
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Real men. Not storybook characters. Their hands made fires, built shelters, and were bound by enemies. Their mouths proclaimed the Word. Their eyes fell upon the Messiah. Their hearts knew both fear, courage, grief, and joy.⁣
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It makes me think of the men of my own domestic church...⁣
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Of calluses and axes, debates and wrestling matches, night prayer, service at the altar, meal time, division and reunion.⁣
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These thoughts help me to connect with the Church when heartache sets me adrift. Every time I hear about another McCarrick, I also hear the words of my brother, Paul...⁣
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"I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you to live in the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel...Evidently some people are throwing you into confusion and are trying to pervert the gospel of Christ. But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach a gospel other than the one we preached to you, let them be under God’s curse!" Gal. 1⁣
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What is foul and false walks among what is holy. I pray that our men will be steadfast in holding the line against that evil, and will be restored to fidelity and clarity...⁣
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We need you, gentleman. The enemy is in the gates. Stand strong for Christ.

Five.

When you are 5 years old, have been counting down the days until you can blow out your birthday candles, and it’s finally time...⁣
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You don’t just blow out your candles, you attack them.⁣
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He wanted a volcano cake and legos. Nailed it. Thank God for the beautiful (and sometimes wild) simplicity of the single digit years.⁣
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Happy birthday week, little Z. May God direct your passion always for His glory. 🔥⁣
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Easy volcano cake:⁣
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• Four boxes of GF brownie mix (we had a crowd to feed)⁣
• Melted chocolate⁣
• Leftover edible glitter from Confirmation cake (see previous post with the flame cake)⁣
• 5 gold candles found in the back of the kitchen drawer⁣
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Bake the brownies. Plop them onto a plate. Drizzle. Sprinkle. Done!

Remembering... to stay awake.

Remembering allows us to move forward with strength. And a deep memory allows us to understand how our sacrifices are connected to the ages. When a man or woman fights for goodness and freedom, they are giving their own lives in union with the Spirit of Christ for His people.

It is telling that the political left draws inspiration from the French Revolution while the right looks to the American Revolution. They are not the same; not in purpose, action, or spirit.⁣
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The distinction clarifies the crisis we now face, and the two powers which have been present through Salvation History: the Spirit of Christ and of His adversary.⁣
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This past year, we have seen American cities engulfed by fire and violence. With fists raised, citizens have shouted: “Equality, Liberty, Fraternity!” Politicians and teachers repeat the same.⁣
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To know history is to understand that the spirit of the French Revolution is not a cry for true freedom… but a demand for blood. They did not rally to liberate their neighbors but to put their heads on pike poles.⁣
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In 1793, the French mob allowed the Committee of Public Safety to give teeth to their demonic urges, crying, “Terror is the order of the day!”⁣
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Why are leaders calling up this spirit in any form?⁣
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Spurred on by propaganda, Americans find themselves elevated in the new class divisions and enjoy their perceived security: “I am safe. I have papers. I voted for them. They won’t bother me."⁣
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It’s a lie, of course. Even Robespierre lost his head after creating a river of martyrs' blood. Every “useful idiot” and tyrant will ultimately perish in misery.⁣
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People say we are seeing communism in America today and it seems true. But that is only one way of saying that the spirit that murdered our Blessed Lord is striking again... as it did in France, in Germany, in Russia...⁣
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Just as Danton sought to destabilize France and the world, Marxists seek to do the same. And in every manifestation of this work, they oppress the faithful. Even in America…⁣
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Where Christ is rejected, every horror becomes possible.⁣
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Stay awake. Lanterns lighted. Become holy. Prepare. Eyes on Jesus alone.⁣
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To those who have given all for godly freedom... I will strive to imitate your courage, teach it to my kids, and commend you to God. Thank you and your families. A blessed Memorial Day to all. 💙⁣
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Molon Labe shirt from @voxclaracollection “Come and take it” Further explanation of this phrase can be found HERE.

Your daughter might need this...

The following is an excerpt from a larger article found HERE. I write a lot of stuff. Some is more important than others... more urgent. This is one of the most important I’ve written because if someone is open to the words, it could help save a life or a soul:⁣
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“DEAR MOMS OF GIRLS...⁣
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We've been around the block a few times. We know things that our girls don't know. But our girls haven't lived in our shoes, haven't learned our lessons, and haven't undergone our conversions....⁣
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We cannot assume that they are equipped to weather the storms we are accustomed to withstanding.⁣
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We cannot assume that when they nod their heads in agreement with our maternal rants that they actually have a deep enough grasp of the truth or an unwavering relationship with Jesus Christ.⁣
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We can’t assume that their attachment to us is stronger than their attachment to someone else.⁣
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We have to be willing to go to the mat for them; to make ourselves a righteous nuisance about technology, defensive protocols, and constant instruction in the art of navigating the human condition.⁣
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I'm not going to sugarcoat this. Some of you think your girl is okay... and she's not.⁣
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God didn't allow me to wade through the sewage in my own life only to stay silent and watch other hearts, minds, and bodies assaulted by wickedness. Here is your warning and I give it with all the sisterly and motherly love in my feminine heart:⁣
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Evil hardly ever comes looking like a monster... but usually appearing like the deepest desires of our heart. We have to be prepared.⁣
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Evil slips through the cracks through our weaknesses and our pride. It finds our sorrows and our loneliness. It listens to our doubts and becomes the consolation and affirmation that we deeply desire.⁣”
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Dear Moms of boys...⁣
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This is for you, too. Let’s raise them right, interfere with them when they stray, oppose predatory behaviors in them, and...⁣
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Learn to recognize the patterns of abuse against them as well.⁣
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Break the silence. Restore the culture. Protect each other.⁣

Read the full article HERE. I recommend reading it with your daughter and sons and discussing together.

Holy Spirit, burn away the dead wood...

More work on the yard this weekend. It feels endless. Mostly gathering up the debris and old wood and putting it into the fire. Saving what is good to be used later.⁣⁣
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It is Pentecost. Praise the Lord! And I keep thinking of the Fire that illuminates, consumes, and burns away the dead wood.⁣⁣
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Today I am committed to praying one of the scary prayers and the great effort of response...⁣⁣
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Holy Spirit, I surrender. Burn away in me all that is dead. Transform me in Your purgative fire. Change my life again. Amen.⁣⁣
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I cannot pray such prayers without an internal hesitation and reservation. But I am told faith is like a muscle. We keep flexing and working the weak flesh and eventually it can do what it could not do before.⁣⁣
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Perhaps by the time I die, I will have only a tiny hesitation left, and then the Spirit wil blow it away with His inestimable mercy.⁣⁣
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On this birthday of the Church, let us not confuse the work of the Spirit with the work of man...⁣⁣
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Men and women are complicated. But Pentecost is not complicated.⁣⁣
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When the people saw the manifestation of the Spirit on Pentecost, they were astonished and asked Peter what they should do. (Acts 2) Peter replied:⁣⁣
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“Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.”⁣⁣
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St. Paul later tells us that the works of the flesh must be burned away if we are to live in the Spirit. (Gal 5) So being part of the Church means to have faith and receive the gifts of the Holy Spirit...⁣⁣
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And then respond with great effort and zeal for the Lord. Participating in allowing the Holy Fire to get rid of what is not of Him.⁣⁣ It seems like a fitting day for me to face the scary prayers and offer them quickly before I chicken out!⁣
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St. Basil says that the power of the Spirit will be given according to the measure of our faith. Well then...⁣⁣
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Let is begin again. Lord, increase my faith!⁣⁣
Come, Holy Spirit! 🔥

Muting the prophets...

Part 2. In response to Christians who use the following argument to defend the use of abortion-tainted products:⁣⁣⁣
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“Many pharma and OTC drugs are developed using babies. Since you use those products, you are a hypocrite to refuse the syringe. You don’t hold yourself to a consistent standard so you lack moral authority. Be silent.”⁣⁣
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And I respond...⁣⁣⁣

It is a lie from the enemy to say we can’t strive after goodness though we are sinners. Or that we must unravel the entire complex enmeshment with evil to righteously oppose it.⁣⁣⁣
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Christ is our authority. In His Truth, we have the authority to speak. Science must serve Christ or it will only and always become a tool of the wicked.⁣⁣⁣
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Abstaining from products derived from the murder of people is not about perfection, but about bringing our actions, as much as possible, in line with Christian principles. It is a process of understanding and responsiveness to the Spirit. Growing in sensitivity to every manifestation of Christ in others.⁣⁣⁣
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I wish I had more hope of changing the system... but cultural impetus has shifted against Christ. The power of corrupted corporations has become political and bigger than "We the people." We have allowed it one compromise at a time.⁣⁣⁣
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Yet... we are commanded to testify to the Truth of Christ. And we are obligated to discipline our appetites to reflect belief and to honor God. Effectiveness in the marketplace is a secondary goal. We belong to Christ.⁣⁣⁣
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German martyr, Fr. Alfred Delp, wrote:

“Ineffectiveness does not dispense one from speaking the truth... whoever makes his decisions dependent upon whether something is futile, is already corrupt.”⁣⁣
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Children have been dissected alive for our use. The practice is ongoing and few object. WE are the primary reason it continues.⁣⁣⁣
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We likely all compromise at times…⁣⁣⁣
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But we should not boast of it. Nor celebrate it. Nor encourage others to participate in it. Not even to save their lives or our own.⁣⁣⁣
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Jesus, be our life. Jesus, be our health. Jesus, be our joy. ❤️

Part 1 HERE

Drink Your Own Poison...

Humor me while I pretend not to be a second class citizen. I scratched my arm and Z gave me one of his bandaids. I'm told that camo is trending in first aid supplies.⁣
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I admit to the clickbait image. I’m grieving a few things and I want to talk about them. I want others to talk about them:⁣
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• Violation of human rights through mass experimentation.⁣

• Loss of informed consent.⁣

• Rejection of Nuremberg Code and Divine Law through coercion, manipulation, risk to health, marginalization, abuse of elderly, disable, and the poor.⁣

• Use of faith to manipulate people into violating conscience.⁣

• Abuse of religious authority to push secular political agenda.⁣

• The new diabolical “theology” that the end justifies the means.⁣

• The oppression of the Imago Dei⁣

• Silencing, doxing, and harassing of professionals who oppose the political narrative.⁣

• Division of communities into clean and unclean (the effective practice of every tyranny) defined by bandaids & papers.⁣
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But one grief is more profound than others…⁣
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That there are few Christians passionate enough to resist the murder of people for profit and health.⁣
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At my judgment, I won’t be able to bring theologians, doctors, or popes with me. Alone, my conscience will be laid bare to the depths, exposed to pure Goodness. And I will be held to account.⁣
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Fr. Michael Copenhagen puts it bluntly:⁣
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“My personal calculus in approaching this treatment is not complex. If you extract my family member’s organs while murdering her, and have the audacity to offer me a medicine produced either in her cultured cells or only use those cells to test your medicine, then I have one response for you: Keep your medicine. Or perhaps the words of the Benedictine prayer are more fitting: Drink your own poison.”⁣
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I've participated in this industry’s evil in the past. I am more careful now. I repent. God is a God of great mercy. Repent.⁣
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Part 2 HERE

What Confirmation is... and what it is not.

I have never been more excited about the upcoming feast of Pentacost. The recent Confirmation of my beautiful daughter added fuel to that fire of desire. Such a simple rite… with so much power.⁣
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It has long been my hope that our diocese would lower the age of Confirmation. Many erroneously think of the sacrament as a “rite of passage” to mature faith. The passing of a test.⁣
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That is all wrong.⁣
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The gift of the Holy Spirit is unmerited and ageless. It can be given to an infant or the elderly. It does not testify to the belief of the individual as much as to the truth of the faith and the power of the Spirit.⁣
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From the Rite of Confirmation:⁣
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“This giving of the Holy Spirit conforms believers more perfectly to Christ and strengthens them so that they may bear witness to Christ for the building up of his body of faith and love.”⁣
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In this culture, when young children are exposed to porn, unbridled secularism, hatred of Christ, and to evil presenting itself like every happiness…⁣
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I hope that more children can receive this unmerited gift of God prior to the loss of faith.⁣
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In the Catechism, St. Thomas is quoted:⁣

“Age of body does not determine age of soul. Even in childhood man can attain spiritual maturity… Many children, through the strength of the Holy Spirit they have received, have bravely fought for Christ even to the shedding of their blood.” ⁣

Confirmation has sometimes jokingly been referred to as “the sacrament of farewell” as teens are already closed off to the graces and leave the Church shortly after…⁣
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What can we do to change this? Especially now in this secular age of growing persecution?⁣
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Parents and sponsors… now is the time to invite the Holy Spirit into our lives with a bold and desperate faith. It is time to pray the scary prayers. The ones that open us to living fully in imitation in Christ and change everything.⁣
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On the birthday of Pope St. John Paul II, it is fitting to say…

“Be not afraid! Come, Holy Spirit, Come!” 🔥

Making Mistakes. Lighting fires.

It hardly ever happens to me as a creative that I have a vision for something and it works out concretely. My problem is that I am usually not proficient in the medium I choose to adventure with. For example...⁣
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Edibles confound me.⁣
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However, I call this attempt a success. Super fun. Lots of mistakes. But the overall effect was just as imagined.⁣
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Full disclosure... This is not a healthy cake. Not at all. 😁⁣
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I blogged about what I used along with some other Confirmation/Pentecost ideas. Go to my profile link to see more.⁣
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It is the lightest post I have written in a long time... and that was kind of nice for a change.⁣
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I’m feeling a little tired in mind and spirit and this diversion was needed. Working creatively on a project is, for me, a lot like exercising. It is a fruitful respite. I can work in a focused way with great effort... but it is uncomplicated. The resting is in the effort.⁣
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The Confirmation itself was wonderful. I can’t wait for Pentecost!⁣
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Also, Instagram isn’t going to direct you to a government organization in a flag on this post. And that’s a bit of a respite as well.⁣
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My stories this week prompted hundreds of dm’s. It was good to hear from so many of you. You really aren’t alone. There was some negativity but most was constructive with very little real ugliness. But the Confirmation post is a relief today. It certainly is.⁣
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Come, Holy Spirit. Heal Your people. Restore us to life. Fill us with your joy. 🔥

Confirmation prep...

My daughter was Confirmed this weekend and the last cookie has been eaten. I’m going to share more soon but wanted to post my cookie recipe for inquiring minds who saw the teaser in my stories.⁣
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I blogged some details of Confirmation prep and the recipe is on there. If you need ideas for Confirmation or Pentecost, perhaps you’ll find something there. The link in HERE.
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My version uses gluten free all-purpose but you can easily sub regular flour. Neither version is healthy. 😉⁣
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Neither is the cake. But it turned out pretty well. If you want to see it before I post here, that’s on the blog as well. It’s the first cake I’ve ever made which turned out exactly like I envisioned. 🔥⁣
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Incidentally, it’s been a while since I’ve lifestyle blogged old style. I forgot how much work it is and now recall exactly why social media micro-blogging has taken over!⁣
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Worth it though. Felt a bit like home.

Your life manual...

Playing in the rain in 2016. I had no idea what the next 5 years would bring. It’s better that way. I would have been afraid.⁣⁣
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2021 is frightening people. And so we must go back to basics...⁣⁣
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Everything you need to know in times of fear is found in Paul’s instructions to the Thessalonians (1 Thes 5).⁣⁣
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Read it when anxious. And then start to praise the Lord with a fierceness that outmatches the wickedness of the enemy. That is the only way. We have to find Him in this or we will fall to despair which is not of the Lord.⁣⁣
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Take heart! Stay sober and alert. Remain steadfast. Praise Him. Follow His Word...⁣⁣
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“But as to the times and the seasons, brethren... you yourselves know well that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night. When people say, “There is peace and security,” then sudden destruction will come upon them as travail comes upon a woman with child, and there will be no escape.⁣⁣
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But you are not in darkness, brethren, for that day to surprise you like a thief. For you are all sons of light and sons of the day; we are not of the night or of darkness.⁣⁣
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So then let us not sleep, as others do, but let us keep awake and be sober... since we belong to the day, let us be sober, and put on the breastplate of faith and love, and for a helmet the hope of salvation.⁣
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For God has not destined us for wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us so that whether we wake or sleep we might live with him. Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing...⁣⁣
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14 And we exhort you, brethren, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all...⁣⁣
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Rejoice always, pray constantly, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit, do not despise prophesying, but test everything; hold fast what is good, abstain from every form of evil.⁣⁣
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May the God of peace himself sanctify you wholly; and may your spirit and soul and body be kept sound and blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.”⁣⁣
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Thanks be to God 🔥

Free SoulCore download...

ANNOUNCEMENT! Every person who registers for the Rise Up & Run virtual 5k will receive a FREE SoulCore digital download from the SoulCore shop. ($14.95 value)⁣
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This applies to any level registration and will be available to download through July 31st.⁣
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I am so grateful to the @soulcoreproject for this gift! And for those in the apostolate who are running and praying with us. (Let’s do this @deannemiller_ !)⁣
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If you have already registered, you will receive this information soon. And if you haven’t registered yet...⁣
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What are you waiting for? 😉⁣
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☀️You don’t have to run, you can walk.⁣
☀️You don’t have to walk, you can roll.⁣
☀️Your prayers will be taken up by those of us who are participating.⁣
☀️Your effort is a testimony, an act of praise, and a gift of prayer for others in your life.⁣
☀️Profits will help support abuse victims in the Church.⁣
☀️Make it a community or family event, grab a friend, or just enter silently into your effort.⁣
☀️T-shirts, medals, stickers, spiritual bouquets available

Simplifying homeschool discernment

Is homeschooling a vocation? A Calling? Many believe it is. I have been told that I can do it because I have that special call... some kind of secret sauce from God that others don't have...⁣
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But that isn't true.⁣
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Homeschooling is tough because parenting is tough. I am far better suited to other things (for example, I'd make a darn good crazy cat lady). Fortunately, I know that anything worth doing requires some struggle. And I know through the example of the saints (and Christ Himself), that God asks us to follow Him to uncomfortable and surprising places.⁣
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The biggest mistake made by discerning parents is to base their decision on feeling. They assume that just because a thing is scary, overwhelming, unknown, difficult, and out of their comfort zone, that God must not want them there.⁣
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At a very fundamental level of discernment, this is a mistake. You know what would have felt awesome this morning? Eating my breakfast in a quiet house with all of the kids being fed and taught by other people... somewhere else. But that is not the decision that my husband and I have discerned to be the best for my kids or, frankly, for me.⁣
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You can read more about this topic on my website in an article called "Homeschooling is Not My Vocation." But I will say one more thing here...⁣
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Mom and Dad... your vocation is first to love. After that comes a tidal wave of prudential decision making rooted in that love. You can't change your vocation, but you can change your mind about schooling...⁣
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You can change schools, go hybrid... heck, you can pull them out tomorrow and live in a treehouse in Peru! There are many ways to love within your vocation...⁣
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But those prudential choices are not your vocation. You are not stuck. It's all hard. You're not necessarily equipped. Don't be afraid. Soldier on.⁣
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We are called to be holy and to lead our children to Christ. Once we have made that top priority, each detail should be able to pass the test: Does it lead them closer to Jesus?

I am the one in brown

Some of the handmade Mother’s Day love notes from my kids. The brown painting in the left hand corner is me.⁣ I also got flowers, new measuring spoons, and a spiritual bouquet with a Mother’s Day bullet. If you know my family, you know which kid gave me that.⁣
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I am content with their love and prayers. My standard answer to “what do you want for x,y,z” holiday is usually...⁣
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A clean house. They all know it but I fear they’ve given up. It might be similar in their minds to mom asking for a million dollars!⁣
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Anyway... the clean house would be wonderful but it is secondary. I want most of all for my children to be happy and holy. I want every effort they give to me to be doubled for Blessed Mother and Our Lord.⁣ Maybe that sounds even more difficult than a clean house. But nothing is impossible for God. Nothing.⁣
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I also have hope of someday finding all my lost measuring spoons! In the meantime, my husband gets me. He understands my deep desire for a holy family AND a functional kitchen.

Mother's Day is Complicated. Mary is not.

When I was 10 years old, life was sometimes stressful. I didn’t know much about Jesus and I didn’t really pray, but I had a rosary.⁣
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I didn’t know how to use it, but I knew Hail Marys were involved. So when my fears and grief were high, I would lay in bed and say two words on each bead...⁣
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“Hail Mary”⁣
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That’s all I knew... until many years later when I finally prayed a full rosary as a young adult.⁣
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Mother’s Day can be a complicated day. So I just keep my eyes on her. She knows what to do. She knows how to gently walk through the mess until she reaches my heart...⁣
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And she touches it gently.⁣
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Oh, sad and blessed day! When I don’t want to be celebrated. When I don’t know how to honor. When I grieve loss and regrets. When I rejoice in the gift of maternal love. When my children remind me how good my life is...⁣
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Keeping eyes on her.⁣
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It was a beautiful day. Thanks be to God.⁣

Who am I? Short answer...

The most difficult question I ever have to answer in an interview is “Tell us about yourself.” It’s not technically a question but it points to one...⁣
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Who are you and what do you want us to know about you?⁣
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Cue existential crisis.⁣
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I trip on it every time. Because it lives at the core of my overthinking brain like an ocean...⁣
⁣Encompassing every experience, confusion, truth, and metaphysical reality about my life.⁣
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All the audience really wants to know is what I do... something interesting about me. And if I don’t have something written in front of me, I fall into the ocean...⁣
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I’m no one, really. Besides belonging to Christ, I live insignificantly with my exceptional husband and our children.⁣ Some are adults and some still eat soap if it smells good. And I do a lot of dishes.⁣
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My left shoulder is higher than the right from hoisting children for 23 years. My left hip is also off because it has been a baby seat for that same time...⁣
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Until now. It’s been 6 years since I’ve been pregnant. Things are different. Who am I? Is that what you asked? Well...⁣
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Good question. I’m changing. I think I’m getting smaller. I matter less which frees me to do more. I wish I had been 44 when I was 20... I would have wasted less of what was given to me. Maybe.⁣
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I write a little. Do this and that. I don’t know. I have some papers and accomplishments and every time I earn one, I have a moment of clarity...⁣
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That it doesn’t matter much. And I’d better go catch up on the dishes.⁣
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Who am I? Good good question. The full answer can be found in the heart of Jesus Christ. And the goal of my life should ideally be seeking His heart... which is where I will find myself.⁣
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But that’s tough to fit into the intro of an interview. I’d better write something else down. 🌸