Rooted Fatherhood

I stood next to the casket of my beloved father-in-law and my knees literally shook with cold and grief. The sorrow on the face of his devoted bride remains etched in my memory.⁣

Broken. We all felt broken. One of the grandsons articulated the feeling as that of being untethered… unmoored.⁣

A good man grows roots in the ground and stays put for his family. They tease about his routines, his stubbornness, and his predictable jokes. And while they kid and flourish…⁣

The roots grow deeper. Solid. Unshakable.⁣

They know this… a little. Until he is gone and then they KNOW…⁣

That he has been rooted and they are the branches. They have felt a faint shaking of earthquakes, the heat of fires, and the gusts of strong winds…⁣ but it is the rooted father who digs deeply and secures the family while they grow. He takes the blows, the flames, the deep shakings.⁣

Every day, his supplications and prayers of thanksgiving rise to the creator. The sun rises and sets. He gets up and does what men do. He toils and he counsels. He kneels and he rests. He battles sin and enemy and elements.⁣

Rooted.⁣

I know what my son meant when he said he felt adrift. We are experiencing a bit of vertigo as the roots shift (but remain) beneath us…⁣

The men seem to feel it uniquely. That they have been loved and raised and held up by a good man, rooted in strength and courage and fidelity. And that they are also made for that greatness.⁣

There is a quickening of life in the presence of death. World events add to the feeling. That now is not the time for weak men, addicted men, immoral men, or timid men…⁣

It is time to take root.⁣
Blessed be God forever.⁣

“Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,⁣
nor stands in the way of sinners,⁣
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;⁣
but his delight is in the law of the Lord,⁣
and on his law he meditates day and night.⁣

He is like a tree planted by streams of water,⁣
that yields its fruit in its season,⁣
and its leaf does not wither.⁣
In all that he does, he prospers.”⁣

Psalm 1:1-3

Parents... Please Pause.

This is not a command but an appeal. I honor your rights as a parent, your conscience, your intellect...⁣

Please pause.⁣


Children have not reached the age of consent for medical care. Parents make those decisions. Some institutions refer to the child's participation as "assent" which they say is “on the continuum of consent." Clever.⁣ But let's discuss...⁣

The bodies of our children will carry the effects of our decisions. They don't really have a choice. So with regard to the vaccine, here is my appeal...⁣

Please consider allowing your kids to wait until the age of informed consent to choose a permanent bodily modification for a low risk illness. There is no evidence that the benefits outweigh the risk. Long term studies have not been done. These kids ARE the test group. There is no control group. No placebo.⁣

The injuries among adults are high. Much higher than any previous treatment of this kind. In years past, it would have been pulled from the market quickly.⁣ With regard to children, the inventor of the RNA vaccine technology has issued a strong warning about the damage which can permanently harm you child…

“Ask yourself if you want your own child to be part of the most radical medical experiment in human history.”

Please listen to his 4-minute statement HERE.

You can ignore his expertise and make your own decision. I understand the confusion which surrounds this issue. But it doesn’t harm anyone to pause. We make the best decisions we can. But as a young mom, I trusted "safe and effective" and TWICE I learned the hard way that it isn't always true.⁣

Doctors don’t pay your bills if it goes south.
Nobody comes home with you to help.
People will be angry with you.
It's weird… but most simply won't care.⁣

I am asking you to pause because I learned the hard way. My kids didn't choose it. I did. I'm sorry. And I can't undo it.⁣

I suspect that 2022 is going to see a dramatic increase in awareness as more doctors ignore parents and use terms like “medical mystery" and "extremely rare"… and then hand them a bill that no family can afford and VAERS won't pay. But moms aren't stupid...⁣

There is nothing on earth that can compensate for an injured child. Nothing.

What happens if our kids "take one for the team?" As a famous pro-V priest put it to me once: injured kids are "an acceptable sacrifice" for the greater good. Not sure how that helps. It doesn’t even console.⁣

So, no. No more. Not for mine.⁣

Please consider pausing.⁣

(This is not a judgment on anyone. I have a specific lens I share from. Not of fear but of reality. I wish health was as easy as a needle. It's not.)

The Door is Open.

“The door is open.” This is the phrase that came to me after prayers and my kids’ lessons today. Before that, I had been sitting heavily in the awareness that “The door is closing.”⁣

It’s the same truth from different angles. I see that the times are shifting and many are falling away from Christ. I feel the quickening of events and the labor pains of a world about to be shaken… sifted…⁣

We are choosing our paths, our teachers, our gods… and it will be difficult to change direction once the storm intensifies.⁣

The door is closing. But it is open.⁣

I gave the kids an assignment today. Read the first Mass reading (Colossians 3:12-17) and also Ephesians 5:1-15…⁣

Then make a list of all that St. Paul says is required of Christians. The “do nots” are important but, for the purposes of this list, make them into positive statements. Marching orders.⁣

So they made their lists and were excited by the concreteness of identity. And I felt my own shift…⁣

The door is open.⁣

Here is their combined list, shortened to fit this space. It is solid. It is specific. It is only the tip of the iceberg, but is sufficient for the day.⁣

The door is open. Enter in…⁣

•Be holy⁣
•Be blameless and pure⁣
•Imitate God as beloved children⁣
•Praise Him⁣
•Walk in love, a fragrant offering to God⁣
•Have faith⁣
•Have a spirit of wisdom⁣
•have a spirit of thanksgiving⁣
•Do fruitful works of light⁣
•Expose the darkness⁣
•Be filled with the spirit⁣
•Be moral⁣
•Be pure⁣
•Be clean of speech⁣
•Be obedient to God⁣
•Walk as children of light, for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true⁣
•Learn what pleases the Lord⁣
•Take part in fruitful things⁣
•Greet one another in psalms and hymns⁣
•Sing to the Lord with all your heart⁣
•Be beloved⁣
•Be compassionate⁣
•Be kind⁣
•Be patient⁣
•Forgive⁣
•Let the word of Christ dwell in you⁣
•Look carefully how you walk because the days are evil⁣
•Worship⁣
•Hold fast to truth⁣
•Press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God
•Be mature minded⁣
•Always and for everything give thanks in the name of Jesus Christ⁣

In this time of great shaking, may we find hope & strength in the fullness of true identity. ❤️

Your daughter might need this...

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The following is an excerpt from a larger article found HERE. I write a lot of stuff. Some is more important than others... more urgent. This is one of the most important I’ve written because if someone is open to the words, it could help save a life or a soul:⁣

“DEAR MOMS OF GIRLS...⁣

We've been around the block a few times. We know things that our girls don't know. But our girls haven't lived in our shoes, haven't learned our lessons, and haven't undergone our conversions....⁣

We cannot assume that they are equipped to weather the storms we are accustomed to withstanding.⁣

We cannot assume that when they nod their heads in agreement with our maternal rants that they actually have a deep enough grasp of the truth or an unwavering relationship with Jesus Christ.⁣

We can’t assume that their attachment to us is stronger than their attachment to someone else.⁣

We have to be willing to go to the mat for them; to make ourselves a righteous nuisance about technology, defensive protocols, and constant instruction in the art of navigating the human condition.⁣

I'm not going to sugarcoat this. Some of you think your girl is okay... and she's not.⁣

God didn't allow me to wade through the sewage in my own life only to stay silent and watch other hearts, minds, and bodies assaulted by wickedness. Here is your warning and I give it with all the sisterly and motherly love in my feminine heart:⁣

Evil hardly ever comes looking like a monster... but usually appearing like the deepest desires of our heart. We have to be prepared.⁣

Evil slips through the cracks through our weaknesses and our pride. It finds our sorrows and our loneliness. It listens to our doubts and becomes the consolation and affirmation that we deeply desire.⁣”

Dear Moms of boys...⁣

This is for you, too. Let’s raise them right, interfere with them when they stray, oppose predatory behaviors in them, and...⁣

Learn to recognize the patterns of abuse against them as well.⁣

Break the silence. Restore the culture. Protect each other.⁣

Read the full article HERE. I recommend reading it with your daughter and sons and discussing together.

Simplifying homeschool discernment

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Is homeschooling a vocation? A Calling? Many believe it is. I have been told that I can do it because I have that special call... some kind of secret sauce from God that others don't have...⁣

But that isn't true.⁣

Homeschooling is tough because parenting is tough. I am far better suited to other things (for example, I'd make a darn good crazy cat lady). Fortunately, I know that anything worth doing requires some struggle. And I know through the example of the saints (and Christ Himself), that God asks us to follow Him to uncomfortable and surprising places.⁣

The biggest mistake made by discerning parents is to base their decision on feeling. They assume that just because a thing is scary, overwhelming, unknown, difficult, and out of their comfort zone, that God must not want them there.⁣

At a very fundamental level of discernment, this is a mistake. You know what would have felt awesome this morning? Eating my breakfast in a quiet house with all of the kids being fed and taught by other people... somewhere else. But that is not the decision that my husband and I have discerned to be the best for my kids or, frankly, for me.⁣

You can read more about this topic on my website in an article called "Homeschooling is Not My Vocation." But I will say one more thing here...⁣

Mom and Dad... your vocation is first to love. After that comes a tidal wave of prudential decision making rooted in that love. You can't change your vocation, but you can change your mind about schooling...⁣

You can change schools, go hybrid... heck, you can pull them out tomorrow and live in a treehouse in Peru! There are many ways to love within your vocation...⁣

But those prudential choices are not your vocation. You are not stuck. It's all hard. You're not necessarily equipped. Don't be afraid. Soldier on.⁣

We are called to be holy and to lead our children to Christ. Once we have made that top priority, each detail should be able to pass the test: Does it lead them closer to Jesus?

Parenting Tips (3 bigs)

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Someone asked me for my top tips for parenting. Well, I still have a lot to learn. But I’ve learned a few big things that I will tell my children when they become parents.⁣

I have quite a long list. (My older kids can sense this coming, I know). But I’ll just pick three today:⁣

1. Don’t yell. At least yell less. Yelling in anger makes you sick and unhappy. Makes your kids reactive and defensive, and reduces their sensitivity to your words.⁣

2. Smile at your kids often. Fake it if you have to. Show them that you like them and love them. Show them that your testimony to Jesus’ love means something more than a Sunday obligation... and that your happiness isn’t just reserved for people outside the house.⁣

3. Read Scripture together every day. Learn to love the Word of God as a family. So that they will have more of His words in their minds than they have lyrics from Frozen. Or whatever is on the radio.⁣

I don’t follow these tips very well. I’m still very much in training (still novice level after 23 years actually). But I have seen these changes make a positive difference in my home when I make the effort.⁣

Well worth it. ⁣